I LOVE GIRAFFES!

girlgrowingsmall:

thunderboltsortofapenny:

recoveringfrommyconvictions:

gaymerboy99:

littlelionmonster:

oldmanstephanie:

"Fuck You, Old People" — Group Piece at CUPSI 2014

"By the way, you can’t actually pick yourself up by your own bootstraps. That’s not how physics works."

FUCK. YES.

this gives me life….

"Act your fucking age" god damn, this has a good message here.

39 seconds in and I reblogged it


hey-sass-butt:

scuttlebuggy:

trashchocolate:

55595472:

eighttwotwopointthreethree:

the-half-boy:

I LIKE IT

I WOULD BUY LIKE A THOUSAND TICKETS FOR THIS

The funniest thing about this is only one of the actors gets drunk and its a different person each night so it isn’t just everyone struggling its everyone else doing their shit and one person fucking it all up it’s BRILLIANT.

HOW DO I AUDITION 

dream job

$29 TICKETS
View Larger

hey-sass-butt:

scuttlebuggy:

trashchocolate:

55595472:

eighttwotwopointthreethree:

the-half-boy:

I LIKE IT

I WOULD BUY LIKE A THOUSAND TICKETS FOR THIS

The funniest thing about this is only one of the actors gets drunk and its a different person each night so it isn’t just everyone struggling its everyone else doing their shit and one person fucking it all up it’s BRILLIANT.

HOW DO I AUDITION 

dream job

$29 TICKETS


hate:

kitsunecoffee:

brilliantinemortality:

vagisodium:

apriki:

never forget that australias first ever winter olympics gold was won because the guy was coming dead last and everyone in front of him fell over


its happening

even better
the only reason he was in the final was bc the same thing happened in the semis
and the only reason he was in the semis was bc one of the guys that came ahead of him in the quarters was disqualified

i’m not sure if he’s the luckiest skater alive or a skater that has the power to curse other competitors.

i’ve been laughing non stop for the past like 10 minutes
View Larger

hate:

kitsunecoffee:

brilliantinemortality:

vagisodium:

apriki:

never forget that australias first ever winter olympics gold was won because the guy was coming dead last and everyone in front of him fell over

its happening

even better

the only reason he was in the final was bc the same thing happened in the semis

and the only reason he was in the semis was bc one of the guys that came ahead of him in the quarters was disqualified

i’m not sure if he’s the luckiest skater alive or a skater that has the power to curse other competitors.

i’ve been laughing non stop for the past like 10 minutes


onemuseleft:

ittlebitz:

starrysleeper:

Wait a minute…

I have been laughing at this for hours now…

So, true story. The woman in this photo is Kendra Kaplan. Her husband was in Iraq for twelve months but the military has this thing called leave. Some of us may recognize the concept from old episodes of Star Trek. In this photo she is five months pregnant after conceiving her second child during her husband’s leave. That envelope in her hand is the ultrasound results. She waited for him to come home to find out if it was a girl or a boy.
There’s been several articles about it.The photo resulted in this woman receiving so much hate mail, from both internet cut-ups and the actual media, that she even took a paternity test and provided proof of her husband’s leave schedule. Her real life friends have stopped talking to her over these rumors.  
Oh, and by the way, that baby bump is a two year old by now. People are still shitting on this woman over a nasty internet meme two years later.
So in short, you’re mocking a faithful wife for something that isn’t any of our damn business anyway and has long since been disproven. 
Good job Internet.
View Larger

onemuseleft:

ittlebitz:

starrysleeper:

Wait a minute…

I have been laughing at this for hours now…

So, true story. The woman in this photo is Kendra Kaplan. Her husband was in Iraq for twelve months but the military has this thing called leave. Some of us may recognize the concept from old episodes of Star Trek. In this photo she is five months pregnant after conceiving her second child during her husband’s leave. That envelope in her hand is the ultrasound results. She waited for him to come home to find out if it was a girl or a boy.

There’s been several articles about it.The photo resulted in this woman receiving so much hate mail, from both internet cut-ups and the actual media, that she even took a paternity test and provided proof of her husband’s leave schedule. Her real life friends have stopped talking to her over these rumors.  

Oh, and by the way, that baby bump is a two year old by now. People are still shitting on this woman over a nasty internet meme two years later.

So in short, you’re mocking a faithful wife for something that isn’t any of our damn business anyway and has long since been disproven. 

Good job Internet.

(Source: itscalledfashionlookitup)


What's so bad about periods from Anonymous

mistyslay:

  • Blood comes out of your vagina for anywhere from 3-7 days
  • That blood you lose can be around 4 tablespoons to a cup
  • a cup of blood, vaginal mucus, and endometrial tissue
  • You get cramps that will make you cry. You can vomit and/or pass out from them
  • You will get horrible mood swings
  • You get headaches
  • Backaches
  • Your breasts hurt so bad sometimes you can’t even touch them
  • You get acne everywhere
  • Your actual vagina could be sore
  • Your feel constantly tired
  • You have a constant fear of soaking through your pad/tampon
  • You can’t lay a certain way in bed
  • You take pill after pill and it still doesn’t help
  • You bloat and gain weight
  • You might have anemia (iron deficiency) which can not clot your blood causing so much blood loss it’ll be deadly
  • You never feel full
  • Everything irritates you
  • You will cry a lot
  • Once you get up in the morning, your center of gravity has shifted and all the blood settling in you during the night will now rush out of you causing you to clench your legs tightly to avoid leaking
  • You get made fun of for having a period ?////?/?/
  • You’re forced to go to school/work
  • You get told that you’re overreacting

but ya know, fixing your dick discreetly in public is bad too


snorting-coke-with-kids:

tabloid-lover:

jamietheundeadamerican:

iwillmindfuckyou:

kneel-on-nails:

forever-kitten:

Damn son our uterus stretches like 5x the size and then contracts and pushes a 7 pound baby out of a small tube into life if you think that isn’t metal as fuck get out of my face

YOUR ORGANS THOUGH IM SO SORRY LADIES

damn selfish babies taking up all the space

NAW MAN, LET ME FUCKING TELL YOU ABOUT PREGNANCY AND BABIES, ALRIGHT?
FIRST OF ALL, IT SUCKS DICK. FIRST OFF LET ME GIVE YOU A MOTHERFUCKING RUNDOWN ON WHAT YOU SHOULDN’T EAT OR DRINK WHEN YOU’RE PREGNANT.
SUSHI
EGGS
NO UNCOOKED ANYTHING IN FUCKING GENERAL ACTUALLY. AND ESPECIALLY NOT FISH.
ANYTHING WITH CAFFEINE IN IT, WHICH INCLUDES COFFEE, SODA, CHOCOLATE (THAT’S RIGHT, NO CHOCOLATE), SEVERAL TYPES OF COOKIES AND CANDIES, AND ENERGY DRINKS.
VEGETABLES AND MEATS THAT ARE RICH IN NITRATES LIKE HOTDOGS, SAUSAGE, LETTUCE, SPINACH AND CELERY.
SO BASICALLY IF YOU’RE USED TO EATING OR DRINKING ANY OF THOSE THINGS YOU BETTER BE PREPARED TO QUIT COLD TURKEY THE SECOND YOU GET PREGNANT.
NOW I’M NOT EVEN DONE. YOU SEE THAT PINK UPSIDE-DOWN TRIANGLE BELOW THE BABY’S HEAD? YEAH? THAT’S YOUR BLADDER. BABIES SQUEEZE DOWN ON THAT LIKE THERE’S NO TOMORROW AND ONCE YOU HIT THE THIRD TRIMESTER, YOU BASICALLY HAVE AN ELDERLY PERSON’S BLADDER. MY MOTHER TELLS ME SHE HAD TO GO TO THE BATHROOM AT LEAST 6 TIMES A DAY JUST SO SHE WOULDN’T WET HERSELF. ALSO WITH A BABY SQUEEZING’ UP AGAINST YOUR FUCKING INTESTINES LIKE THAT SAY HELLO TO CONSTIPATION NATION, EVERYONE.
SO NOT ONLY DO YOU HAVE THE BLADDER AND BOWELS OF AN OLD PERSON, BUT THAT GROWING HUMAN BEING GROWING OUT OF YOUR GULLET ALSO PUTS A HUUUUGE STRAIN ON YOUR BACK. NOT TO MENTION IT’S A PAIN IN THE FUCKING ASS TO MOVE ANYWHERE, SINCE YOU NEED TO START WALKING LIKE SOMEONE OUT OF A MONTY PYTHON SKIT JUST TO GET AROUND EFFICIENTLY. ALSO THAT ADDED WEIGHT MAKES YOUR FEET ACHE SOMETHING AWFUL. SO WHAT CAN YOU DO?
WELL GUESS WHAT. YOU CAN’T TAKE ASPRIN. ABSOLUTELY NO ASPRIN. NO IBUPROFEN, NO NAPROXEN NO NOTHING. 
SO NOT ONLY ARE YOU IN PROBABLY THE MOST UNCOMFORTABLE YOU WILL EVER BE, BUT YOUR MEDICINE CHOICES ARE EXTREMELY FUCKING LIMITED. (AND NO, I MENTIONED NO CHOCOLATE EITHER.)
DO YOU GUYS NOT REALIZE THAT THE FATE OF SOCIETY AND THE HUMAN RACE IN GENERAL IS BASED ON THE FACT THAT WOMEN MOSTLY CHOOSE TO GET PREGNANT? FOR LITTLE TO NO REWARD?! THE UNITED STATES ONLY GIVES 12 UNPAID WEEKS OF MATERNITY LEAVE ON AVERAGE. 
YOU WOULD THINK THAT THE FUCKING PROCESS BY WHICH OUR POPULATION CONTINUES TO GROW WOULD BE FUCKING REWARDED AND CELEBRATED, NOT SWEPT UNDER THE FUCKING RUG LIKE A PIECE OF FUCKING DUST.
/RANT OVER

Greatest rant ever.


12 weeks?! What the hell? In Canada it’s a YEAR, because a mother is kind of instrumental in a babies growth and development.. woman are seriously expected to leave their three month old baby with someone else so they don’t lose their job. That’s so shitty. And I didn’t know about most of the othet things above. Women in general put with so much shit.

You forgot about heartburn. Ahhhhhh the heartburn because fun hormones to make your esophagus flaps not as right annnnd a baby pushing on your stomach causing the acid to go right up your throat! Woooo and the inability to get comfortable to sleep but feeling miserably tired all the time! But I guess baby is pretty worth it

snorting-coke-with-kids:

tabloid-lover:

jamietheundeadamerican:

iwillmindfuckyou:

kneel-on-nails:

forever-kitten:

Damn son our uterus stretches like 5x the size and then contracts and pushes a 7 pound baby out of a small tube into life if you think that isn’t metal as fuck get out of my face

YOUR ORGANS THOUGH IM SO SORRY LADIES

damn selfish babies taking up all the space

NAW MAN, LET ME FUCKING TELL YOU ABOUT PREGNANCY AND BABIES, ALRIGHT?

FIRST OF ALL, IT SUCKS DICK. FIRST OFF LET ME GIVE YOU A MOTHERFUCKING RUNDOWN ON WHAT YOU SHOULDN’T EAT OR DRINK WHEN YOU’RE PREGNANT.

  • SUSHI
  • EGGS
  • NO UNCOOKED ANYTHING IN FUCKING GENERAL ACTUALLY. AND ESPECIALLY NOT FISH.
  • ANYTHING WITH CAFFEINE IN IT, WHICH INCLUDES COFFEE, SODA, CHOCOLATE (THAT’S RIGHT, NO CHOCOLATE), SEVERAL TYPES OF COOKIES AND CANDIES, AND ENERGY DRINKS.
  • VEGETABLES AND MEATS THAT ARE RICH IN NITRATES LIKE HOTDOGS, SAUSAGE, LETTUCE, SPINACH AND CELERY.

SO BASICALLY IF YOU’RE USED TO EATING OR DRINKING ANY OF THOSE THINGS YOU BETTER BE PREPARED TO QUIT COLD TURKEY THE SECOND YOU GET PREGNANT.

NOW I’M NOT EVEN DONE. YOU SEE THAT PINK UPSIDE-DOWN TRIANGLE BELOW THE BABY’S HEAD? YEAH? THAT’S YOUR BLADDER. BABIES SQUEEZE DOWN ON THAT LIKE THERE’S NO TOMORROW AND ONCE YOU HIT THE THIRD TRIMESTER, YOU BASICALLY HAVE AN ELDERLY PERSON’S BLADDER. MY MOTHER TELLS ME SHE HAD TO GO TO THE BATHROOM AT LEAST 6 TIMES A DAY JUST SO SHE WOULDN’T WET HERSELF. ALSO WITH A BABY SQUEEZING’ UP AGAINST YOUR FUCKING INTESTINES LIKE THAT SAY HELLO TO CONSTIPATION NATION, EVERYONE.

SO NOT ONLY DO YOU HAVE THE BLADDER AND BOWELS OF AN OLD PERSON, BUT THAT GROWING HUMAN BEING GROWING OUT OF YOUR GULLET ALSO PUTS A HUUUUGE STRAIN ON YOUR BACK. NOT TO MENTION IT’S A PAIN IN THE FUCKING ASS TO MOVE ANYWHERE, SINCE YOU NEED TO START WALKING LIKE SOMEONE OUT OF A MONTY PYTHON SKIT JUST TO GET AROUND EFFICIENTLY. ALSO THAT ADDED WEIGHT MAKES YOUR FEET ACHE SOMETHING AWFUL. SO WHAT CAN YOU DO?

WELL GUESS WHAT. YOU CAN’T TAKE ASPRIN. ABSOLUTELY NO ASPRIN. NO IBUPROFEN, NO NAPROXEN NO NOTHING. 

SO NOT ONLY ARE YOU IN PROBABLY THE MOST UNCOMFORTABLE YOU WILL EVER BE, BUT YOUR MEDICINE CHOICES ARE EXTREMELY FUCKING LIMITED. (AND NO, I MENTIONED NO CHOCOLATE EITHER.)

DO YOU GUYS NOT REALIZE THAT THE FATE OF SOCIETY AND THE HUMAN RACE IN GENERAL IS BASED ON THE FACT THAT WOMEN MOSTLY CHOOSE TO GET PREGNANT? FOR LITTLE TO NO REWARD?! THE UNITED STATES ONLY GIVES 12 UNPAID WEEKS OF MATERNITY LEAVE ON AVERAGE. 

YOU WOULD THINK THAT THE FUCKING PROCESS BY WHICH OUR POPULATION CONTINUES TO GROW WOULD BE FUCKING REWARDED AND CELEBRATED, NOT SWEPT UNDER THE FUCKING RUG LIKE A PIECE OF FUCKING DUST.

/RANT OVER

Greatest rant ever.

12 weeks?! What the hell? In Canada it’s a YEAR, because a mother is kind of instrumental in a babies growth and development.. woman are seriously expected to leave their three month old baby with someone else so they don’t lose their job. That’s so shitty.

And I didn’t know about most of the othet things above. Women in general put with so much shit.

You forgot about heartburn. Ahhhhhh the heartburn because fun hormones to make your esophagus flaps not as right annnnd a baby pushing on your stomach causing the acid to go right up your throat! Woooo and the inability to get comfortable to sleep but feeling miserably tired all the time! But I guess baby is pretty worth it

(Source: choosechoice)